December 3, 2025

 Listen to Learn or Learn to Listen. Either way, it speaks to me about meditation. I have heard it said that prayer is talking to God, or your higher power if the word God unsettles you. Meditation is listening for the answer to your question. By listening, we learn.

December 2, 2025 - First Things First

 First Things First reminds me of the reading in our book on step eleven that tells me upon awakening we consider our plans for the day. Before we begin we ask God to direct our thinking, so the first thing we do each day is pray. Someone I know says that the days I pray almost always turn out better than the days I don't. Most good ideas are simple.

December 1, 2025 - Love

 Love is my word today. Love comes in many forms and there are many ways to express love. When I bake cookies and bring them to a meeting, it's a way to show my love and gratitude to the new person. When I knit a scarf or a blanket and give it to someone less fortunate than I, then again it is out of love.

November 30, 2025 - Into Action

 My sponsor told me that step one would identify the problem - a lack of power. Step two would offer me a solution to my problem - Power. In step three I would get the opportunity to make up my mind, do I want to continue on the path to destruction or do I want to live in the solution? Once I decided to stay here, it would be necessary to take the steps that would apply the solution to the problem, the program of action. Here I am, 28 years sober, still launching into action.

November 29, 2025 - Surrender

 I blogged a bit just now about the weather and how we are unable to control what the weather around here will be life. We have to accept the hand we are dealt, to surrender to what it will be, to accept life on life's terms. My word today was surrender.

November 28, 2025 - Service

 Service. On November 28, 2012, me and a few other like-minded persons, started a non-profit. That's actually the day it was incorporated. The purpose of the non profit was to perform service within our community, which we performed well over the next 12 years. It always reminds me that service work is not only done in the fellowship nor is it always done in church, it is often performed out there, in the world. We are presented with opportunities to give a little something back to the community that we took so much from when we were drinking.

November 27, 2025 - Tolerance

 Tolerance never gets old with me. Part of the slogan live and let live. Allowing others the right to think, believe and act as they see fit, even if what they think is not what I think, and even if what they believe is not what I believe, and even if what they do is not what I would do.

November 26, 2025 - Expectations

 Expectations is the word today. As was said to me in a conversation today, expectations is a tricky one. I responded that the best way is not to have expectations, but that it is often hard not to have them. So yes, it's tricky.

November 25, 2025 - Let Go Let God

 Let Go Let God. I have been getting these same few words....Trust. Surrender. Let Go Let God...repeatedly over the past few days. Some people have commented on that. I tell them all the same thing. We get the lessons until we learn them. The celebration for my 28 years of sobriety is tonight at my home group. Will it go well? will certain people that I have invited be there? I can always make plans but I cannot plan the outcome. In some instances I just need to surrender and trust the process. My higher power knows what is best for me.

November 24, 2025 - Trust

 Trust is the word, again. It was only a few days ago I picked that word. But you know what they say. You get the lesson until you learn it. I should trust that God knows what he's doing.

November 23, 2025 Open minded

 In 7 days, I will have been clean and sober for 28 years. I had to become and to remain open-minded about  the concept of choosing a power greater than myself that helped me solve my problem.

November 22, 2025 - Daily Inventory

 Daily Inventory. Couple things that stick out. The first word of that reminds me how frequently I should be doing it. Daily. An inventory is a report of what I had to begin with, what I have used and what I have left. I'm pretty sure that it's my inventory they're talking about, not yours.

November 21, 2025 Let Go Let God

 Let Go Let God is a slogan that reminds me there are some things in my life over which I do not have control, things which I need to leave the outcome of up to God.

November 20, 2025 - Trust

 Trust is the word today. Trust is difficult for a lot of people. I tell people that I trust God and I let him decide who else is to be trusted. God hasn't let me down yet. I might have let Him down a few times but I'm working on it.

November 19, 2025 - Hope

Hope is the word for today. When we tell our stories, we share our experience, what we have done when we were shut off from the sunlight of the spirit, our strength which is our faith in a power greater than ourselves, and our hope, that a brighter future awaits us in sobriety.

November 18, 2025 Live and let live.

 Live and Let Live. I usually focus more on the let live part of thar slogan, when the live part is equally as important. I ought to try and "live" my life by the principled actions I have chosen and to enjoy life as much as possible.

November 17, 2025 Help Others

 Trust God, Clean House, Help Others. A popular slogan with us. Interesting, how there is a passage in the book Alcoholics Anonymous, on page 98. .....a man can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust god and clean house. Did I mention that this quote is from the chapter Working With Others?

November 16, 2025 Willingness

 Word today is willingness. I am willing to be where God wants me to be today and to do what He would have me do. Most good ideas are simple.

November 15, 2025 Selfishness

 Selfishness is the word today. In my program of principled action, I am encouraged to watch out for selfishness, among other defects that I have. They do that because they know I will sometimes be selfish and sometimes it's okay to be selfish. It's only when my selfishness impedes on others that I need to be careful.

November 14, 2025 - Surrender

 The word today is surrender. 28 years ago today, it was snowing. I had planned to go to the friday night meeting at Club 24, but because of the weather I stayed home. As a result, the following day while I was on a train starting my journey to Wyoming, I had a relapse. Not going to that meeting probably wasn't the reason I relapsed but it was definitely a contributing factor. Today, I surrender to the realization that I am powerless over alcohol and that continuing to practice this program I'm involved in will insure my immunity to alcohol.

November 13, 2025

 Pride. Pride can be beneficial when it is a feeling of high self-esteem but when we start thinking we are smarter or better than others because of our accomplishments or when we place our own desires ahead of others and we use pride to justify our actions.

November 12, 2025

 On November 30, 1997, I decided to try not drinking for one day. One day turned into a week, the week became a month, that month became 12 months, a year without drinking, the year became a decade, the decade became a quarter of a century and this month it will be 28 years. Today it is 10,209 days. one day at a time. I don't count each day. There's an app for that.

November 11, 2025

 Gossip. I try not to listen to it and I try not to spread it, but it is easy to slip into it if I am trying to express my concern about someone or let someone else know that so and so is doing okay. But, I should be careful not to condone benign gossip or I might start to condone malignant gossip.

November 10, 2025 - Keep It Simple

 Keeping it simple today. Did my readings. Picked my word for today which obviously was Keep It Simple. Shared my word with all the people I share it with and then some. Meeting a sponcee at 10. I should have my breakfast.

November 9, 2025 Unity

 Unity is my word today. I am endeavoring to maintain unity in the fellowships I belong to by trying to keep the traditions alive within them.

November 8, 2025 - Acceptance

 I don't know how much more can be written about acceptance. Napoleon is reported to have said Accept things as they are, not as you wish them to be. And Virgil said, "Perhaps someday it will be pleasant to remember even this."  So, the concept of acceptance has been around for centuries. Go figure.

November 7, 2025 Help Others

 Help Others is what I got from the god box today. I was reminded of the slogan....Trust God, clean house, help others. I was also reminded of the phrase when all else fails, drag a drunk (to a meeting). Carrying the message to others encourages us to lose interest in selfish things and to gain interest in others. When I concentrate on them and on their problems, I tend to focus less on me and my problems. Most good ideas are simple.

November 6, 2025 - Willingness

 Willingness. Key to Step Three which I will be going over today with someone I sponsor. Even in Step Two, it says do I now believe or am I even willing to believe, so willingness is where it starts.

November 5, 2025 Gratitude

 I've been told that gratitude is not always a noun, it is also a verb. A wise man once said, if you want to show people your gratitude, find the person in the room with the least amount of sobriety and explain to that person everything that God has done for you that you could not do for yourself.

November 4, 2025 - Amends

Amends is not about saying we are sorry. It is about setting the matter straight before we screwed it all up. 

November 3, 2025 - Keep It Simple

 Keep It Simple.  The simplest way for me to look at it is I am alcoholic. I am powerless over alcohol.

November 2, 2025 - Fear

 Fear. I had a little of that this morning. I have a committee meeting for the roundup and I'm a little concerned about an issue we are having. I do know that in the past I have lived on self-reliance and that worked with most things. These days I rely on God to handle the things I am unable to, so I ask God in my morning prayer to remove my fear of the outcome of the meeting and we'll see how that goes.

November 1, 2025

 Gratitude is my word today. It is definitely an active word. Saying I'm grateful is nice, but showing my gratitude is better.

October 31, 2025 - Patience

Patience is my word and I have very little of it today, especially for people who do stupid things. Though I am always reminded that I have done a lot of stupid things in my past and other people had to have a lot of patience with me. 

October 30, 2025 - How Important Is It?

 How Important Is It?  If it's my sobriety, it takes precedence over everything and everybody. It has to. Because without my sobriety I would have nothing anyway. if it's something that throws me off my beam and threatens my sobriety, then I need to deal with that right away and dealing with it might mean letting go and letting God handle it.

October 29, 2025 Let Go Let God

 Let Go Let God. It's self-explanatory. An interesting way to put it because it's not about self at all. I remember hearing an old timer say whenever I did things Bob's way all I ever got was Bob's results, but when I did things God's way, the results I got were much better. (His name wasn't Bob, by the way.)

October 28, 2025 - Open Minded

 My first thought on being open-minded is about spiritual concepts. I ought to keep my thoughts and my mind open to the notion that there might be a Power greater than Bernie that can solve my problems.

Second, I need also be open-minded when it comes to others perception and conceptions of their Higher power or lack of it and maybe their sexual orientation is different from mine, or maybe they think they only need one meeting a week.

Allowing others to think, believe, and act as they see fit does not include me thinking, believing, nor acting as they do. It merely requires keeping my mind awake to the possibility that what they are doing is working for them.

October 27, 2025 - Help Others

 Help Others. I read something this morning about using humility while engaging in love and service. I'm speaking tonight so I'll try to help others by being humble.

October 26, 2025 - Responsibility

 Responsibility is my word today. I overslept and was not able to attend church like I do every Sunday. However, part of my weekly responsibility is to God, so luckily my church has a streaming service so I am attending church virtually this morning.

October 25, 2025 - Keep It Simple

 Keep It Simple is my reminder today. Always good to remember that I shouldn't over complicate things.

October 24, 2025 - Surrender

 Surrender. "The principle that we shall find no enduring strength until we first admit complete defeat...." - Twelve Steps Twelve Traditions, page 21 A paradox, to be sure.

October 23, 2025 - Sponsorship

 Sponsorship is the word today. I have a sponsor. And I am one. I reemember back when I was early in sobriety, some 28 years ago, I had not asked that guy to be my sponsor and he had not volunteered. It just worked out that way. He was talking. I was listening. Eventually, while we were taking the steps, I realized he was my sponsor. I often say that if not for him and his direction, I might not have gotten sober. And, if not for the people I sponsor now, I might not be able to stay sober. When that little johnny guy told his teacher he was having trouble with math, she gave him math homework. When I told God I was having trouble with patience and tolerance, he sent me people to sponsor.

October 22, 2025 - DENIAL.

 Denial. DENIAL. Don't Even Notice I Am Lying. Kinda says it all.

October 21, 2025 - Easy Does It...But Do It

 Easy Does It. I have a lot to do, but I should be careful not to over-burden myself. I'm not 16 anymore. But do it means I should not use easy does it as an excuse not to do anything.

October 20, 2025 - Open minded

 Open minded is my word for today. I am always reminded that the word is used when we think about spiritual concepts. That we should keep our minds open to the fact that a higher power does exist.

October 19, 2025 - Selfishness

 Selfishness. I watch out for that, for signs that I am trying to concentrate more on what Bernie thinks Bernie should do.

October 18, 2025 - Gossip

 Gossip. It's not always malicious. Sometimes we are trying to help someone who is usually not there. But if we get into the habit of talking about others, in a nice way, we are often tempted to start gossiping about them in a not so nice way. Probably better to just not do it at all.

October 17, 2025 - How Important Is It

 How Important Is It. I probably say the same thing every time I get this word. If its my sobriety, then it takes precednce over everything else, because without my sobriety I wouldn't have anything anyway. If it's one of those things that gets in between me and my sobriety, then it it has no real importance and I should get rid of it, promptly and without regret.

October 16, 2025 - Anonymity

 If I'm in Sobeys or Giant Tiger and we see each other and I'm with someone who doesn't know I'm in the program, I might pretend I don't know you. You should respect that.

October 15, 2015 - Tolerance

 Tolerance is my word today. It teaches me that everyone is different and that though I may not approve of or even like the way a person is living their life, it's their life not mine.

October 13, 2025 Forgiveness

 St Francis Prayer says it is by forgiving others that we ourselves are forgiven and in the Lords Prayer it says Forgive us our tresspasses as we forgive those who tresspass against us.

October 12, 2025 - Easy Does It.....But Do It

 This slogan reminds me not to take on more than I can handle, but also not to use that as an excuse to not do anything at all.

October 11, 2025 - Gratitude

 Gratitude. Looking for gratitude in situations is much better than focusing on the negative in them.

October 10, 2025 - Service

 Service. Love in action. Galatians 5:13 says, “Serve one another humbly in love. Some of the service I do for God is by being of service to my fellow man. I have heard it said, in AA, that service is anything that makes it possible to help a new person. I'm going to do a few things today to make that possible.

October 9, 2025 - Keep It Simple

 Keep It Simple. I went to bed at 1030 pm and slept until 8 am I had a good rest so I'm hoping to face today successfully. If I remember to keep things simple it should be okay.

October 8, 2025 - Insanity

 Insanity is knowing what to do, and not doing it.

October 7, 2025 - Anger

 My word today is Anger. It doesn't mean I am experiencing anger. I don't think I am. There was something that was said last night that irked me a little but I tried to disregard it. Getting angry about something that is how someone else views life and not how I view it, is just wasting my time really.

October 6, 2025 - Into Action

 I remember what my AA sponsor said to me years ago. Step One tells me what my problem is - a lack of power. Step two offers me a solution to my problem - power. In Step Three I am given the opportunity to choose between the problem or the solution. It's a no-brainer, really. Once I have decided to stay here and try to live my life on a spiritual basis, then I have to do the work necessary to apply the solution to the problem. Steps 4,5,6,7,8, and 9. The action steps. Whenever I think about going into action I think about taking the steps. Luckily, I took mine in 1998. I get to revisit the steps every time I sponsor a new person and sometimes I even learn something new about myself during the process.

October 5, 2025 - Love

The word today is Love. The sermon at church this morning was about communion and how being servants to each other is an expression of God's love. Faith without works is dead but the work is not to list the good things we do but to just do them. Just do the service we do  and do it from a perspective of love.

October 4, 2025

 One day at a time reminds me that life does not happen to me all at once and that I shouldn't treat it as though it did. When I decfided I wanted to stop drinking, my fears were what will I do this New Year's Eve, if I'm not drinking? What will I do on my birthday, if I'm not drinking? But, really, I don't have any control over things that have not happened yet just as the same as I cannot change things that have already happened. All I really have control over are the events happening right now and not even those are things I can control. I can only control how I respond to them, today. So, I tried just not drinking for one day, today. It's true that I have been doing that for just over 10,000 days but who's counting.

October 3, 2025 - Keep It Simple

 Keep It Simple. When I wake up, the first thing I do is remind myself I'm still an alcoholic and I might still need help getting through the day. That's simple enough for me.

October 2, 2025 - Expectations

 It's difficult not to place expectations on people. We expect them to show up for scheduled appointments or we expect them to treat us with respect or not to gossip about us. But, they, like ourselves, are also human and they will make mistakes. They may not live up to our expectations of them. We then have choices. We can be disappointed with them or we can accept that they made a human error and forgive them for doing or for not doing what we expected from them. A better choice would be not to place an expectation on them in the first place and then we would not need to worry about disappointment. Maybe you didn't expect that from me?

October 1, 2025 - Tolerance

 Tolerance. The AI dictionary tells me that Tolerance is the ability or willingness to accept the existence of opinions, behaviors, or beliefs that differ from one's own. It’s a cornerstone of peaceful coexistence and mutual respect in diverse societies. I looked the word up years ago before we had google and the dictionary then told me that tolerance was the readiness to allow others to think, believe and act as they see fit. It doesn't say I have to like it or even that I have to agree with it or start thinking feeling or acting that way. Just that I acknowledge that my way isn't the only way.

September 30, 2025 - Forgiveness

 It is by forgiving others that we ourselves our forgiven is a line from the Prayer of St. Francis. Another way of saying that is in the Lord's Prayer.  Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us. So, we do, as humans, practice forgiveness. We do not do it as well as Jesus, but we do it as well as we humans are capable of.

September 29, 2025 - Gratitude

 Gratitude. Whenever I am having a bad day, I think of things I am grateful for. It usually takes me out of the self-pity pit I am in. If something is going on that I find negative, I try to find the positive aspects of it. Then, gratitude becomes a useful tool.

September 28, 2025 - Service

 Service comes in many forms. One of the ways I do service is to bake cookies and bring them to meetings or events. Each week, after Sunday service at church, we have a coffee hour. I bring cookies to that as a way to do service in my community also. Sometimes, service can just be a smile and a hello welcome its good to see you. So, never think you can't do service because you probably are already doing it.

September 27, 2025 - Trust

 Trust is my word today. I would have liked an easier one, but I don't really get to decide what the word will be. It's called a god box for a reason. I will "trust" that my higher power knows what he is doing.

September 26, 2025 - Let Go Let God

 Let Go Let God. As long as I don't still think I am God, then that would be an easy slogan.

September 25, 2025 - Hope.

 Hope. Something I try to share with new people. A hope that if they do certain things, then their life will improve.

September 24, 2025 - Anonymity

 Anonymity. Some people are careful never to break theirs and others couldn't give a second thought to protecting theirs. Everybody is different. Bill W, co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, once wrote. "Each member of Alcoholics Anonymous should be entitled to the degree of anonymity he or she chooses, and the rest of us should respect that."

One concern in our digital age is when we send an email to multiple recipients, that everyone sees everyone else's email address. However, if a person has given explicit permission for their email address to be used then it is not an anonymity violation.

September 23, 2025 - In All Our Affairs

 In all our affairs. I try to live my life using spiritual principles and this phrase reminds me that I need to practice those principles in all areas of my life. Not just some of the things I do, but in all my affairs.I should always be humble. I should always avoid gossip and anger and dishonesty and selfishness. They are, of course, ideals, and I may not always exercise them to the extent that I would like to. I am a work in progress.

September 22, 2025 - Gossip

 Gossip is the word I got today. I heard many responses this morning, most of them were that gossip is not a good thing. My favorite definition is that gossip, barbed with our anger, is a polite form of murder by character assassination. Charcacter is what we are, reputation is what people who gossip about us thinks we are. This post is mostly other people's wisdom. The rock guitarist Kid Rock sings a song where he says you can try to change me or love me just the way that I am. So, if you don't like the person I am and you would like to create a reputation by spreading stories about who you think I am, then really that isn't about me. That's about you.

September 21, 2025 - Selfishness

 Selfishness. I am told it is the root of my troubles. It is being concerned with one's own agenda, often at the expense of others.

September 20, 2025 - Sponsorship

 I'm pretty sure that without the guidance of my original sponsor, I would never have stopped drinking and would likely have died from alcoholism. I'm also fairly certain that without having sponsored the alcoholics that I have over the past 28 years, that the quality of the life I live would not be as enriched as it has been.

I often tell the Little Johnny joke about sponsorship. Little Johnny was having trouble with math so he told his teacher. In response, his teacher gave him more math homework. I told God that I was having trouble with patience, so God gave me people to sponsor. And so, I learned Patience, and Tolerance, and Forgiveness. They don't always take my direction, but then I did not always take the direction of my sponsor. I still thought I knew what was best for me.

September 19, 2025 - Humility

 Best description I have heard yet for Humility is that it isn't about thinking less of myself, it is thinking of myself less. I ought to place the needs of others ahead of my own. But, I ought to do so with prudence. If I'm on an airplane and it is in trouble, I should help my fellow passengers, but I ought to first see to it that my oxygen mask is on before I try to help them with theirs.

September 18, 2025 - Keep It Simple

 Keep It Simple. I can very easily complicate things. It is in my nature. But, if I keep things simple right from the start mraning when I wake up I remind myself that I am still powerless over the people places and things in my life. I'll just try to take things as they come today.

September 17, 2025 Service

Service. Talking with my sponsor earlier about how service is an expression of love. She said we have to use love when we are doing service, especially with people we sponsor. Sponsorship of others is a great way to do service. Service in AA is not the only way to help others. We can do service outside of the fellowship, in our community. I'm involved with a ministry that my church does. We make blankets for persons who are less fortunate than us. That's another way I do service.

September 16, 2025 Acceptance

 Acceptance is the embracing of reality as it is, without resistance or denial. That is the dictionary definition. Applied to my life today, somehow I have gotten too old to work. I have gotten too old to do a lot of things. I could pretend I am still healthy and muddle through things or I can embrace the reality of my situation. The latter seems to be the easier, softer way, and ultimately I am always looking for that.

September 15, 2025 - Open Minded

 I was raised as an Anglican. I went to Sunday School. I practiced the Ten Commandments. When I was in my teens, I joined a street gang, so I stopped going to church. By the time I got to AA, I didn't believe in God, I didn't want to believe in God and I didn't care if you believed in God as long as you did your believing someplace else. My sponsor suggested I try acting as if. He said just go through your day acting as if there was a god. If, when you get to the end of your life, you find out there isn't a God, then all you will have done wrong is live a good life and how wrong is that, really. He then said that if I go through acting as if there isn't a God and I get to the end and find out that there is a god, then I'll be in deep kaka. My sponsor suggested that I try to keep an open mind where spiritual concepts are concerned and that I didn't have to believe in what he believed in because it wasn't God as He understood Him, it was god as I understood him. Admittedly, that was a new concept for me. So, in the beginning my understanding of God was flimsy. It's true that I eventually went back to being Anglican, but I did that as a choice. Nobody forced me to do that. I just became open minded enough to accept that God as being my God.

September 14, 2025 - Responsibility

 Responsibility is my word for the day. I have a responsibility today to represent the district which I serve. There is a service fair happening this afternoon, where the chairs of the central service committees, Public Information, Cooperation with the Professional Community, Corrections, Treatment, etc set up displays about what their committee does and obviously they try to get members interested in what they do maybe get some volunteers to help them out. It is my responsibility as District Committee Member (DCM) to show up, meet with them, let them know that the district supports them in what they are trying to do. I'm also chair of the midwinter roundup committee and I'd like to have them set up displays at our event in February so I'll be talking to them about that also.

One of things I need to always be aware of is the responsibility I have to those I am responsible to and whenever possible to honor that commitment. And hey, I baked cookies for the event. Technically, that wasn't something I was responsible to do. But, I did it anyway, because that's how I roll.

A good way to end a conversation is to start talking about service commitments and then suddenly everyone has something else they need to do right now, because they want to be a member but not that kind of member. I recall from my early days as Chair of the Public Information Committee that one of my responsibilities was to fight apathy within the fellowship, apathy in that context being defined as a lack of interest in service. Really, the only way to fight apathy is to become active in service and hope that others will see how your involvement in service is benefiting you and your recovery and that might enourage them to become involved. Leading by example as it were.

September 13, 2025 - First Things First

  First Things First reminds me to place the important stuff in front of everything else. A friend of mine says "The days that I pray almost always turn out better than the days I don't." So, the first thing I do each day is pray. When I wake each morning and before I'm out of the bed, the first thing I do is remind myself that I am still an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink for 10,149 days but all that means is I have another 24 hours sober. I'm not cured yet. It's called alcoholism not alcoholwasm. After I accept that, I make sure I ask God to give me a little help getting through the day, because I didn't get sober on my own power. 

September 12, 2025 - Love

 Love. It comes in many forms. Self-love and self-care is important. Respecting and caring for oneself is the foundation for loving others. What I come here looking for I must come here looking with. that was a saying an old friend of mine brought to my attention when I was attempting to gain the love of my step-daughter. It was, he said, similar to the St. Francis prayer, that it is better to comfort than to be comforted, to understand than to be understood, to LOVE than to be LOVED. If my desire is for others to respect me, then I should respect others. If my desire is to be loved, then I should love others. The teachings of Jesus encourage us to love our enemies, so it is not something that some new age therapist came up with last week, it has been around for centuries. Don't take my word for it. It's in the Book.

September 11, 2025 - Trust

 Trust. It's something we earn and sometimes it's a thing that can be broken and often lost. It is possible to regain trust. Trust is synonymous with faith which is believing in the unseen. Someone said to me today that they trust the day will be a good one. Of course, we do not know what the day will bring but if we trust our higher power, and perform his work well, chances are we will have a good day. Someone else said trust the process. Again, that speaks to me about having faith in powers unseen.

September 10, 2025 - Willingness

 Willingness. The dictionary definition is the quality or state of being prepared or inclined to do something. It reflects a person's openness, readiness, or eagerness to act, help, or engage in a task or situation. One thing I have learned about being willing is that it is not something I am ever forced to do. That would defeat the purpose of the term.

September 9, 2025 - Amends

 Once, while going through steps eight and nine with a man I sponsored, when we got to the eighth step and it says, in the book, we made a list of the people who harmed us, we already have the list, we made it when we took inventory, the man said uh-oh. I asked him to please explain. He then told me that at another meeting he heard a guy with long term sobriety say that when he had done his fifth step, he burned his fourth step. I said so you burned your fourth step. He said no but I buried it under a tree in North Carolina. It reminds me that although members with long term sobriety sometimes say things that sound like something we should do, we should probably mention it to our sponsor before we do them.

Many years ago, before I had a sponsor and before I had actually read the book, the whole book, not just the parts I thought applied to me, I made amends to my first wife. I told her that I had been unfaithful to her and when she asked me with who, I told her. I don't know how much harm I did to her relationships with those women but I should not have mentioned them because I was trying to exonerate myself.

September 8, 2025 - Anonymity

 Anonymity. Coincidence is how God protects his anonymity. 

In regards to personal anonymity, some people would say I should keep my membership in an anonymous fellowship a secret. I do not. I never was very concerned with anyone seeing me stumbling home after a drinking binge. Why should I be concerned with anyone knowing I am trying to do something about my drinking problem? Bill W, co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous is reported to have said. "Each member of AA is entitled to the degree of anonymity that he or she so chooses and the rest of us should respect that." So, if I don't want to tell you any more than my first name, you should respect that. If I don't mind telling you my full name, my phone number, my email, my facebook, instagram, whatsapp or whatever, you should respect that also.

September 7, 2025 - Honesty

 Honesty is the word I picked from the god box today. I don't think it means cash register honesty although that is good, also. I also don't think it means truthfully answering questions like "Does this dress make me look fat?" Every morning when I wake up, just before I get out of bed, I remind myself that I'm still an alcoholic, that just because I stopped drinking does not mean I don't have alcoholism. It's not called alcoholwasm. Since there are many good things in my life now, it would be easy to convince myself that I'm okay now, that I don't have to do the things that got me to where I am today. That type of thinking would be dishonest. Why would I want to stop doing something if it's working?

September 6, 2025 - Humility

 I heard a definition of Humility once that has stuck with me. Many people confuse the word Humility with the term Humiliation. But the definition said that Humility is not about thinking less of myself, it is about thinking of myself less.

September 5, 2025 - Let Go Let God

 Whenever I have something in life that I start to worry about, I try to remind myself that I am no longer running the show. I try to Let Go of being in control of the situation and Let God handle the outcome. Most good ideas are simple.

September 4, 2025 - Anger.

 Anger. A strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. It’s a natural response when we feel wronged, threatened, or frustrated. It can range from mild irritation to full-blown rage. I had a lot of anger growing up. Anger toward others and sometimes anger directed at myself. Since working this spiritual program, I have less anger, but I am still human. I still get frustrated, but no longer do I have rage.

September 3, 2025 - Tolerance

 Tolerance. I used to think it was how much I could drink. My sponsor told me to look up words in the dictionary whose meaning I was not clear on. Nowadays, you can just google it, but we didn't have google back then. Tolerance is defined as the willingness to accept or respect opinions, behaviors, or identities that differ from your own. I saw another definition once that called it the readiness to allow others to think, feel, and act as they choose to. Readiness and willingness are almost synonyms. Concerning the behaviour of others, I might not like their behaviour, and the definition does not ask me to like it, just to accept and respect it.

September 2, 2025 - Hope

 Hope is both a feeling and a force. The dictionary definition is a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen. I am convinced that there are no coincidences in life. My intention last night was to bring someone I am sponsoring to a speaker meeting so she could hear someone share their experience strength and hope and it ended up being me that did the speaking. When I shared, there was some hope within what I said, hope that if I did certain things then good events would come to pass for me. Whenever I do share, I try to tell people how I established a relationship with the god of my understanding and how the development of that relationship enabled me to overcome my obsession to drink and use and to become as it says in our literature "happily and usefully whole". My hope last night was that I might have said something that helped someone else on their journey to sobriety. Time will tell. 

September 1, 2025 - Faith

 Faith. One definition says a kind of inner conviction that things will work out, even when logic says otherwise. For many, faith is how they make sense of suffering, joy, purpose, and morality. I acquired faith when I realized that there was a Power greater than my own which could solve my problem. My problem was quite simply a lack of the power needed to make the right choices. Now, I have faith that the power greater than my own can guide me to make better choices.

August 31, 2025 - Keep It Simple

Keep It Simple. Today is Sunday. I'm going to church. After the worship part there is a coffee hour. I bake cookies for them to use during coffee hour. Usually, I have something going on in the afternoon, like a committee meeting or a workshop, so I only bring one dozen cookies to coffee hour and then I have a dozen for later in the day. Today, I just have church in the morning. So, I'm thinking if I bring a dozen to coffee hour, then I can have a dozen for the meeting on Monday night. But, will they still be fresh. This slogan reminds me not to over-complicate things but to keep them simple. I'll just bring all the cookies to coffee hour and tomorow I'll bake more.

August 30, 2025 - Selfishness

 Selfishness and self-centeredness. That we think is the root of our troubles. - Alcoholics Anonymous, page 62. Selfishness is one of my character defects. According to the spiritual program of action that I try to follow, I should continue to watch for selfishness and when I see it manifesting in my life, I should ask God to remove it. I recall the definition I read once about humility. Thinking of myself less. Hopefully I am losing interest in myself and what I can do for myself and I'm becoming more interested in others and what I can do for them.

August 29, 2025 - Patience

 Patience was never one of my good qualities. Yesterday, I bought a new cell phone. The last one I had I bought before Covid. They didn't have any more of those so the guy sold me a samsung galaxy A06. It looks nice, has sufficient memory, takes nice photos. But, it won't recognize the old SIM Card from the other phone. So, can't get my old contacts and can't get it to transfer my old data so its basically useless after I leave my home's wi-fi network. But, I didn't throw it across the room or beat it to death with a ball peen hammer. I just tried a few things and since none of those things worked, I'm taking it to my cell phone service provider to see if they can figure it out. I have learned that although I know a lot of things about a lot of things, I do not know everything and sometimes I just have to take my problem to a higher source and see what He can do.

August 28, 2025 - Live and Let Live

 Live and Let Live. There are two parts to this slogan. I often focus on the second part, to Let Live. I realize that I live my life according to spiritual principles and that not everyone else has those spiritual principles. They may even have a lack of principles, but that is okay and I should let them live their lives they way the see fit. That teaches me tolerance. But, I also should live my life. A friend of mine has spoken to me recently about self-care and how that is important in one's own life. The principles by which I live are such things as acceptance, gratitude, and humility. Acceptance requires living life on life's terms. Gratitude is wanting all that I have. And humility is thinking of myself less.  

August 26, 2025 - Sponsorship

 Sponsorship is the word today. I just was talking to someone about that and I repeated something I heard once. Get one and Be one. I know that I got a sponsor early on in my recovery. I did not ask him to be my sponsor and he did not volunteer to be my sponsor. He was doing the talking and I was doing the listening. We did the twelve steps together and so I refer to him as my sponsor. Over the years, I have been a sponsor to many men and to a few women. I am convinced that having a sponsor saved my life and by being a sponsor, that continues to save my life.

August 26, 2025 - Insanity

 Insanity. The word comes from the Latin insanitas, meaning “unsoundness of mind”. And while it’s often misattributed to Einstein, the quote “doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results” isn’t actually a formal definition—but it’s a popular cultural take on irrational behavior. At least that's the answer that AI gave me. Where alcohol was concerned, I definitely was strangely insane. Based on repeated occurrences of bad behaviour and even worse results, and despite the fact that things never went as well as I imagined they would, I kept doing it. I often say that during the first ten minutes after my first drink, when I was twelve years old that everything in Bernie's world was just the way Bernie wanted it to be, all the guys were afraid of me and all the girls were in love with me. And I chased after that ten minutes for twenty-nine years and never found that feeling again, but I kept looking. I kept doing the same thing over and over, thinking it would be different and it never was. Finally, at age 41, I stopped.

August 25, 2025 - Trust

 Trust is the word. At its core, trust is a belief in the reliability, integrity, or ability of someone or something. It’s what allows us to feel safe enough to be vulnerable, to take risks, and to rely on others without constant fear of betrayal or disappointment. In AA we say trust God, clean house, help others. Helping others is our one true aim. But, we cannot transmit something we haven't got, so we clean our house first. Even when an airplane is crashing, before you help others you must put your own oxygen mask on. And, before you attempt a housecleaning in the sense that the twelve steps require, you should first place your trust in God as you understand God. Often easier said than done.

August 24, 2025 - One Day At A Time

 One day a time reminds me that I cannot change a single thing I did yesterday or predict anything I will do tomorrow. I can only control what I do today. When I decided to quit drinking alcohol, I was not able to fathom never drinking again. What will I do on new year's eve? What will I do on my birthday? What will I do on your birthday? But, really, all I had to concern myself with was whether or not I would drink that day. Not having a drink or a drug for one 24-hour period was much more manageable. That was 10,129 days ago, one day at a time.

August 23, 2025 - Into Action

 Into Action is the theme for today. I decided many years ago that the life I was living was not a healthy one and I chose to adopt a better way of life. But, my life didn't just magically change, I had to take action and make changes, and I need to keep making changes, keep taking action else I will slip back into my old way of thinking. If I fail to enlarge my spiritual way of life, I will relapse. The experiences of those who have gone before me are a testament to that.

August 22, 2025 - Service

 My word today is service. Some say it's my middle name. Bill W once said that service, as AA uses it, is anything that makes a twelfth step possible. The twelfth step being to carry the message to the alcoholic who still suffers. That can mean putting a meeting on in detox or at a shelter for homeless or displaced persons, talking to somebody about AA, setting up chairs at a meeting, shaking someone's hand, being a committee chair or being a sponsor, making coffee at a meeting, the list goes on and on.

Not meant to be a brag, but just as an example. Currently, I am District Committee Member, I am chair of the 2026 Midwinter Roundup committee, I serve as a corrections correspondent, I sponsor about a dozen persons, I bake cookies and bring them to various meetings, and when I go to my home group, I usually help set up the meeting. None of those commitments is any more important than the other. They are all ways to be of service, all are ways to carry the message.

I have been sober since November of 1997 and I have been doing service since November of 1997. I think the two are connected.

August 21, 2025 - Acceptance

 Much has been written about Acceptance. I have a little book that my stepdaughter gave to me as a gift one day. In that book, it says, " Acceptance and rejection are not merely opposites. Acceptance is a gift whereas rejection is a weapon. Happy is he who lets the weapon rust and crumble through misuse. Happier still is he who cares for the gift daily and polishes it to a brilliant luster." It does not say where the quote is from.

Gratitude and Acceptance are good tools when used together.

August 20, 2025 - But For The Grace of God

 In Christian theology, God's grace is defined as an undeserved favor, mercy, or love, that is shown to humanity. I like to think of it as my higher power sparing me from drinking or from other calamities that happen to people around me that don't happen to me. Like, when I see someone relapse and wind up throwing their blessings away, knowing that I am no better than they are, and that could just as easily have been me, I say to myself but for the grace of god there go I. 

August 19, 2025 - Faith

 Faith is the word I picked today. I remember reading, in the Bible, Seek ye the Kingdom of heaven and all else will follow. It doesnt't say you have to find it, you just have to seek it. Even in the 12th step fellowship I am in, it says God could and would if he were sought, but I don't have to find God, I just have to seek Him and through the seeking of God, I develop faith, faith that all will be well if I continue to do His will. Faith that I may be restored to sanity. Faith that I may be relieved of the anger within me. Faith to replace the fear I had.

Faith is trusting in something without the need for proof.

August 18, 2025 - How Important Is It

 How Important is it. Depends on what IT is. If IT is my sobriety than it takes precedence over everything else. Because, after all, anything that I put in front of my alcoholism I will likely end up losing anyway. So if IT is something that I thought was important....it probably isn't.

August 17, 2025 - Responsibility

Responsibility is my word for today. I think the thing I always need to remember is to keep the responsibilities I have and not to concern myself with things that are not my responsibility, such as you keeping the responsibilities that you have.

August 16, 2025 - Gratitude

 Each morning, when I arise, I read from the AA book 24 Hours A Day and I read from an Al-anon book Courage to Change. Then, I pick my word for today from my God Box and I share that word with a bunch of like-minded folk. Yesterday, one of those people said that her friend out west could certainly benefit from this. So, I told her to tell her friend to reach out and connect with me. She did and as a result I met another beautiful soul. For that, I am grateful today.

Gratitude is not about having everything you want; it is about wanting everything you have.

August 15, 2025 - Hope

 Hope is the word today. In our preamble, it says we share our experience, our strength and our HOPE in order to stay sober and help others achieve sobriety. Hope is a desire that things will improve, and in our case it is a testament that things will get better. In the 3rd Step Prayer, we ask God as we understand God, to take away our difficulties, our defects of character, so that victory over them may show those we would help of His Power, His Love, and His Way of Life, to give them Hope that if they come here with us and practice this way of life, their life will become more manageable.

August 14, 2025 - Insanity

 Insanity has been said to be doing the same thing, over and over, expecting a different result. I heard a speaker from Kentucky say that insanity was being in a twelve step program and not doing the twelve steps. Another guy I heard said that insanity is knowing what to do and not doing it, or was that knowing what not to do and doing it anyway.

August 13, 2025 - Surrender

 The word today is Surrender. In the first week of December, 1997, I was in a country church in Meductic, New Brunswick. I surrendered that day to a God that I barely understood and have not found it necessary to take a drink since that day. It is one of the paradoxes of the 12-step philosophy is that by admitting complete defeat, we begin to achieve victory. That's an indirect quote from their literature, but still true today.

August 12, 2025 - Expectations.

 My word today is Expectations. I can make plans but I cannot plan the outcome of those plans. I had a plan for today. It has already changed because someone changed their mind. I did not get angry because really I had no expectations on her and on what would happen. I just conclude that God must have a plan of his own on what's going to happen today and it did not involve what I had in mind. We gets wiser as we gets older.

August 11, 2025 - Selfishness

 When I was still drinking, I was very selfish. I only did things for other people if I thought I would benefit also or if I thought it would make me look good. I also talked a lot about all the wonderful things I was doing to make the world a better place. I was, as they say, self-absorbed.

When I came here, to this life without drinking alcohol, I learned that selfishness and self-centeredness was the root of my trouble and that I had to be rid of the selfishness or it would kill me. Our literature tells me that I could try to get rid of self-will using self-will but it won't really work. I needed the help of my higher power, God. 

Today, I try to do God's will, not Bernie's will. God helps me think of others and place their needs ahead of my own. By taking an attitude such as that, I find I do get something out of it, but the motives have changed. I no longer do things for others so that I will get a reward but because I am being unselfish in my motives, I am rewarded in other ways.

August 10, 2025 - Amends

It is a natural thought to want to quickly make amends to those we have harmed by our actions or inactions, but we should always remember that we do that during Step Nine, not when we are on Step One or Two or Four or Five. The reason the steps are numbered is because we do them in order. Be patient and follow the path we have laid out for you. These are the steps we took. We know they work.

August 9, 2025 - One Day At A Time

 I remember when Nancy and I decided to walk this road together. I told her that I'd like to promise her the moon and the stars and that I'd love her until the end of time, but I didn't know what I'd be doing at the end of time. I only knew what I'd be doing that day, so all I could truly promise her was one day. Today. If we wanted to do it the next day we could decide on that day. That was March 24, 1998. 

Trying to imagine doing something or not doing something forever is a large task. But, deciding to do it or not do it for just 24 hours is much more manageable. Because, when we think about it, we have no control over what happens tomorrow or the day after that or the day after that, but we can choose to do things this day. and when tomorrow gets here, then it will be today and we can make those choices again.

August 8, 2025 - Pride

 Pride and fear are said to be the main stumbling blocks to true progress when character building. Pride says we don't have to look at that and fear says you better not look at that.

Pride is an opinion of oneself and one's achievements and is often a positive characteristic, yet when taken to extremes it can become arrogance and self-centeredness.

August 7, 2025 - Sponsorship

About 28 years ago, my sponsor repeatedly told me that I could not keep the sobriety I had unless I carried the message to other alcoholics. So, I started to sponsor other alcoholics. Not all of them got sober. But, everytime I sponsored an alcoholic, I stayed sober. I was told, and it's in our book, that having had the experience myself (of working the twelve steps), I can give these people much practical advice (of working the twelve steps). I can't tell them how to get their job back or how to get their spouse off their backs or how to successfully dodge their creditors. I just tell them how to avoid taking a drink and after they have been away from a drink for a period of time, those other life problems that they are having may work themselves out. So, only two things you need to know about a sponsor. Get one. and Be one.

August 6, 2025 - Willingness

 The word today is Willingness. I have learned that developing the quality of willingness is essential to the effectiveness of the 12 Step program. It concerns the daily taking of Step Three where we make a decision to turn our will (our thoughts and feelings) and our lives (our actions and behaviors) over to the care of God as we understand him. So, we place everything in the care of God. I might not always be willing to surrender the outcome of certain things to the will of God, but when I see how the results of other things I have placed in his care have turned out in a positive way, I am more inclined to do it.

August 5, 2025 - Patience

 When little Johnny told his teacher he was having trouble with the math, she gave him more math homework. When I told God I was having trouble with Patience, he gave me people to sponsor.

August 4, 2025 - Gratitude

 This morning, the word I picked was Gratitude. Yesterday, my wife had to be taken to the Emergency ward of the local hospital for severe abdominal pain. After ten hours, she was diagnosed with a kidney infection and a pulled muscle and given a prescription for antibiotics and pain meds. She is home today and just waiting for the medication to start taking effect. I am grateful for this, and I am sure she is as well.  It was explained to me once that gratitude is not having everything we want; it is wanting everything we have.

Name Change

 The name of this blog has changed. It used to be called As Bernie Sees It. The blog began as part of a joke someone said to me. "Is that how Bernie sees it?" But, now, it has become a series of posts based on the word I pick from my God Box every day. I realize that not everyone believes in God, so you might want to use another word. It won't bother me.

July 16 - But For The Grace of God

 I sponsor people. My sponsor used to say. Get a sponsor and be a sponsor. In the early days, it was suggested that men sponsor men and women sponsor women. For many years, I followed that suggestion. Nowadays, I am not concerned with what pronoun you use to identify with. If you ask me to sponsor you and I have the time to sponsor you, then I will do it. The big book of Alcoholics Anonymous says that "having had the experience myself, [of doing the twelve steps] I can give them much practical advice. That's what I try to do.

I was sponsoring a women and we were starting to get through the steps. At one point, she dropped off my radar. I can't tell you her story, I only know one story - mine. I can tell you she was gone 4 months, and I learned at last that she was in the hospital. I went to visit her. I brought my wife who is also in the program and I brought a guy I was sponsoring. 

When I entered the room I had been told she was in, I thought I was in the wrong room. She was in her mid-forties, but the frail woman on the hospital bed appeared to be in her eighties or nineties. As it turned out, it was her. I barely recognized her.

We talked and part of her story unfolded. According to her, she had almost died this time from overdosing on alcohol and drugs. At one point, she cried out to God to send someone looking for her. Luckily, her father found her in her apartment and got her some medical attention.

All I was able to do now was listen to her, hold her hand briefly, let her know that AA and I were there when she wanted to come back to meetings. She wept. At first, she cried in shame and embrassment, but when she saw that I was not judging her, her tears turned to tears of gratitude.

She told me that I always said to her, "You have to place recovery above everything, for without recovery you will lose everything." It is an indirect quote from our literature. She told me that she wished she had listened to me.

I wish I knew that all would be as it should be but I haven't seen her in a few days. I'm hoping to get in to see her again. I had left her a couple of grapevine magazines which I plan to read to her or with her, if she is still interested.

All three of us, myself, my wife, and the man I sponsor agree that but for the grace of God, that could be us lying in that bed.

May 07

My word for today is Trust. When I googled it, I got a lot of different reponses. One resonated with me. A firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. I trust God and I try to let him lead me to people who also trust God and hopefully we can learn to trust one another. Some people may argue as some people always do, that trust can be broken or damaged and therefore it is safer and wiser not to trust. Human beings are fallible. That is why I trust God first. Because my God is infallible. Maybe there was some other reason I was directed to that person or situation. So, although I may stop trusting that person or thing, I continue to trust in God's plan for me.